๐—Ÿ๐—ฒ๐—ฎ๐—ฟ๐—ป๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด > ๐—–๐—ต๐—ฎ๐—ป๐—ด๐—ฒ – a Formula For Success

Learning > Change

This is a formula for success.

Your ๐˜ญ๐˜ฆ๐˜ข๐˜ณ๐˜ฏ๐˜ช๐˜ฏ๐˜จ, the rate at which you adopt and expand your skills as leader, needs to exceed the rate at which your environment ๐˜ค๐˜ฉ๐˜ข๐˜ฏ๐˜จ๐˜ฆ๐˜ด.

If not, you’ll fall behind and others will pass you by.

Has your learning kept up? Are you consistently making time for personal and professional development?

Prioritizing your full inbox, however inevitable and important it might feel, is short-term thinking. And it will never get empty.

As leaders, we face bigger expectations, more complex challenges, and higher stakes.

So how do you ensure your growth stays ahead of the curve? Here are three steps:

1๏ธโƒฃ Reflect Regularly
Block out time each week to review whatโ€™s working, whatโ€™s not, and what you can learn from it all.

2๏ธโƒฃ Seek Feedback
Blind spots grow in the dark. Ask for candid input oftenโ€”donโ€™t wait for formal reviews.
๐˜ˆ ๐˜ญ๐˜ข๐˜ณ๐˜จ๐˜ฆ ๐˜๐˜‰๐˜™ ๐˜ด๐˜ต๐˜ถ๐˜ฅ๐˜บ ๐˜ด๐˜ฉ๐˜ฐ๐˜ธ๐˜ด: 95% ๐˜ฐ๐˜ง ๐˜ฑ๐˜ณ๐˜ฐ๐˜ง๐˜ฆ๐˜ด๐˜ด๐˜ช๐˜ฐ๐˜ฏ๐˜ข๐˜ญ๐˜ด ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ช๐˜ฏ๐˜ฌ ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ฆ๐˜บ ๐˜ข๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ด๐˜ฆ๐˜ญ๐˜ง-๐˜ข๐˜ธ๐˜ข๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ. ๐˜–๐˜ฏ๐˜ญ๐˜บ 10-15% ๐˜ข๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ.

3๏ธโƒฃ Invest in Yourself
Read, take courses, or get help. Your development isnโ€™t a โ€œnice-to-haveโ€ but a โ€œmust-have.โ€

Change is inevitable. Falling behind doesnโ€™t have to be.

How has your learning kept pace with your changing role over the past year?

How to Have Real Conversations & Connect With People

Person A: “I, I, I, me, me, me.”
Person B: “Fascinating! Because I, I, I, me, me, me.”
Person A: “That’s so true, reminds me of… I, I, I, me, me, me.”

This is how most ‘conversations’ go: two people taking turns talking about themselves.

Itโ€™s not surprising. Weโ€™re wired to think about ourselves most of the time.

But when all we do is talk about ourselves, we miss out on something important.

We donโ€™t learn anything new.
We donโ€™t grow.
We donโ€™t build real connections.

๐Ÿ’ก ๐——๐—ผ๐—ปโ€™๐˜ ๐—ฏ๐—ฒ ๐—น๐—ถ๐—ธ๐—ฒ ๐—ฃ๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐˜€๐—ผ๐—ป ๐—” ๐—ผ๐—ฟ ๐—•. ๐—•๐—ฒ ๐—น๐—ถ๐—ธ๐—ฒ ๐—ฃ๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐˜€๐—ผ๐—ป ๐—–.

Person C makes conversations meaningful.

If someone brings up a topic, they ask questions like:

“What does that mean to you?”
“How did you get into that?”
“What do you like most about it?”

Person C doesnโ€™t just talkโ€”they listen and learn.

This doesnโ€™t mean you should never talk about yourself. Conversations are a two-way street. But when you go into a conversation with curiosity and a desire to learn, amazing things happen:

๐ŸŒŸ You learn new things.
๐Ÿ‘€ You see the world in new ways.
โค๏ธ You build stronger relationships.
๐Ÿค People feel heard and valued.

Next time youโ€™re in a conversation, pause and ask yourself:

๐—”๐—บ ๐—œ ๐—น๐—ถ๐˜€๐˜๐—ฒ๐—ป๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด ๐˜๐—ผ ๐—ฟ๐—ฒ๐—ฝ๐—น๐˜†, ๐—ผ๐—ฟ ๐—ฎ๐—บ ๐—œ ๐—น๐—ถ๐˜€๐˜๐—ฒ๐—ป๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด ๐˜๐—ผ ๐˜‚๐—ป๐—ฑ๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐˜€๐˜๐—ฎ๐—ป๐—ฑ?

This small change can make a big difference.

As a Leader, Do You Always Need to Have the Answer?

Youโ€™re not a search engine.

But as a new leader, it can feel like you have to be one.

Your team asks questions. Pings you on Teams. Calls. Emails. And the instinct? Respond. Immediately. Every single time.

The problem? Constant interruptions chip away at your ability to focus, and focus is what you need most as a leader.

Itโ€™s what allows you to steer the ship, plan strategically, and make thoughtful decisions for your teamโ€™s success.

When you spend your days responding to every ping and notification, you lose the time and energy for the deep thinking that drives real progress.

What can you do?

โ€ข ๐—˜๐˜€๐˜๐—ฎ๐—ฏ๐—น๐—ถ๐˜€๐—ต ๐—ฏ๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—ป๐—ฑ๐—ฎ๐—ฟ๐—ถ๐—ฒ๐˜€: Set a daily hour of uninterrupted focus for you and your team.
โ€ข ๐—˜๐—บ๐—ฝ๐—ผ๐˜„๐—ฒ๐—ฟ ๐—ผ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐˜€: Encourage your team to solve what they can without you, building their confidence along the way.
โ€ข ๐—ฅ๐—ฒ๐—ณ๐—ฟ๐—ฎ๐—บ๐—ฒ ๐˜†๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—ฟ ๐—ฟ๐—ผ๐—น๐—ฒ: Leadership is about guiding the team toward long-term success, not managing every moment.

Start protecting your focus.

Itโ€™s the key to being the leader your team needs.

What if your manager or client gives you more work than you can handle?

What do you do when your manager or client asks you to take on more workโ€”when your schedule is already packed?

Most of us have two typical responses:

Say ๐˜†๐—ฒ๐˜€, and brace yourself for even more ๐˜ด๐˜ต๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ๐˜ด๐˜ด.
Say ๐—ป๐—ผ, and worry about coming across as ๐˜ถ๐˜ฏ๐˜ฉ๐˜ฆ๐˜ญ๐˜ฑ๐˜ง๐˜ถ๐˜ญ.

But thereโ€™s a better wayโ€”a skill borrowed from improv that can change everything.

Imagine this: Youโ€™re in a meeting, and your manager suddenly asks you to โ€œtake chargeโ€ of an urgent project. Your calendar is already full, but saying no feels risky.

Or picture this: A client asks for extra work, and the deadline is tight. Saying yes means youโ€™ll struggle to keep up with everything else, yet saying no might feel like letting them down.

This is where โ€œ๐—ฌ๐—ฒ๐˜€, ๐—ฎ๐—ป๐—ฑโ€ฆโ€ comes in.

The phrase โ€œYes, andโ€ฆโ€ comes from improv theater. Instead of rejecting an idea, performers use it to build on each otherโ€™s thoughts, creating a sense of flow.

In a work setting, it works much the same way. Hereโ€™s how it sounds in practice:

โ€œ๐˜ ๐˜ฆ๐˜ด, ๐˜โ€™๐˜ฅ ๐˜ฃ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ฉ๐˜ข๐˜ฑ๐˜ฑ๐˜บ ๐˜ต๐˜ฐ ๐˜ด๐˜ถ๐˜ฑ๐˜ฑ๐˜ฐ๐˜ณ๐˜ต ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ช๐˜ด, ๐˜ข๐˜ฏ๐˜ฅ ๐˜โ€™๐˜ฅ ๐˜ฏ๐˜ฆ๐˜ฆ๐˜ฅ ๐˜บ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ๐˜ณ ๐˜จ๐˜ถ๐˜ช๐˜ฅ๐˜ข๐˜ฏ๐˜ค๐˜ฆ ๐˜ฐ๐˜ฏ ๐˜ธ๐˜ฉ๐˜ช๐˜ค๐˜ฉ ๐˜ค๐˜ถ๐˜ณ๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ๐˜ฏ๐˜ต ๐˜ฑ๐˜ณ๐˜ช๐˜ฐ๐˜ณ๐˜ช๐˜ต๐˜ช๐˜ฆ๐˜ด ๐˜ต๐˜ฐ ๐˜ข๐˜ฅ๐˜ซ๐˜ถ๐˜ด๐˜ต ๐˜ต๐˜ฐ ๐˜ฎ๐˜ข๐˜ฌ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ช๐˜ต ๐˜ธ๐˜ฐ๐˜ณ๐˜ฌ.โ€

With โ€œ๐—ฌ๐—ฒ๐˜€, ๐—ฎ๐—ป๐—ฑโ€ฆโ€, you keep your response open and positive while setting clear boundaries. It helps you stay engaged without overcommitting.

The magic of โ€œYes, andโ€ฆโ€ is that it also:

โ€ข Shows youโ€™re willing to collaborate
โ€ข Acknowledges that your time and energy are limited
โ€ข Puts the choice back in their hands, giving them a sense of control

Next time someone asks you to do more than you can handle, try these two simple words.

Let me know how it goes ๐Ÿ™‚

Starting Leaders – Don’t Fall For the Power Paradox.

Have you ever watched a colleague get promoted to team lead, only to see them change?

They start off grounded, empathetic, and fair. Then, slowly, that openness starts to fade. They seem less interested in feedback. More impulsive. And the empathy? Itโ€™s like it vanished.

Sound familiar? This change isnโ€™t uniqueโ€”itโ€™s a trap nearly every leader risks falling into.

This is the ๐—ฃ๐—ผ๐˜„๐—ฒ๐—ฟ ๐—ฃ๐—ฎ๐—ฟ๐—ฎ๐—ฑ๐—ผ๐˜…, a term coined by psychologist Dacher Keltner.

And now it gets interest: it doesnโ€™t just impact โ€œother leaders.โ€ ๐™๐™๐™ž๐™จ ๐™˜๐™ค๐™ช๐™ก๐™™ ๐™—๐™š ๐™ฎ๐™ค๐™ช, ๐™ฉ๐™ค๐™ค.

The Power Paradox concept explains how, as leaders gain power, they often lose the very qualities that like respect and trust that led them to power. Keltnerโ€™s research shows that power affects the brain, triggering dopamine and sparking a โ€œhighโ€ that can become addictive.

While it feels great, it also blunts social awareness, turning focus inward and making self-serving decisions feel โ€œright.โ€

If youโ€™re a leader, donโ€™t assume youโ€™re immuneโ€” ๐˜ข๐˜ธ๐˜ข๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ๐˜ฏ๐˜ฆ๐˜ด๐˜ด is the key to avoiding this trap.

๐—›๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐—ฒโ€™๐˜€ ๐—ต๐—ผ๐˜„ ๐˜†๐—ผ๐˜‚ ๐—ฐ๐—ฎ๐—ป ๐—ด๐˜‚๐—ฎ๐—ฟ๐—ฑ ๐˜†๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—ฟ๐˜€๐—ฒ๐—น๐—ณ ๐—ฎ๐—ด๐—ฎ๐—ถ๐—ป๐˜€๐˜ ๐—ถ๐˜:

  1. ๐—ฃ๐—ฟ๐—ฎ๐—ฐ๐˜๐—ถ๐—ฐ๐—ฒ ๐—˜๐—บ๐—ฝ๐—ฎ๐˜๐—ต๐˜† ๐—ฅ๐—ฒ๐—ด๐˜‚๐—น๐—ฎ๐—ฟ๐—น๐˜†: Empathy fades fast with power. Keep listening, and make a habit of asking your team what they really need. Adopt a regular โ€˜Loving/Kindnessโ€™ meditation practice to increase empathy.
  2. ๐—ฆ๐—ฒ๐—ฒ๐—ธ ๐—›๐—ผ๐—ป๐—ฒ๐˜€๐˜ ๐—™๐—ฒ๐—ฒ๐—ฑ๐—ฏ๐—ฎ๐—ฐ๐—ธ: Power can make people reluctant to be honest. Show your team that you genuinely value their insights, not just their agreement.
  3. ๐—ฆ๐˜๐—ฎ๐˜† ๐—š๐—ฟ๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—ป๐—ฑ๐—ฒ๐—ฑ: Real leadership is about serving others. Focus on the teamโ€™s success and growth, not just your own.
  4. ๐—ฃ๐—ฎ๐˜‚๐˜€๐—ฒ ๐—•๐—ฒ๐—ณ๐—ผ๐—ฟ๐—ฒ ๐—”๐—ฐ๐˜๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด Power drives impulsive decisions. Before you make a call, take a breath. Ask yourself: who does this really serve?

The Power Paradox is real, and it can sneak up on anyone. Stay aware, and protect the qualities that make you a true leader.

๐—ฅ๐—ฒ๐—ฎ๐—น ๐—ฝ๐—ผ๐˜„๐—ฒ๐—ฟ ๐—น๐—ถ๐—ณ๐˜๐˜€ ๐—ผ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐˜€ ๐˜‚๐—ฝ. โฌ†

A controversial take on giving feedback..

Sometimes, not giving feedback is selfish.

We avoid it for two main reasons:

  1. We want to be liked.
  2. We fear confrontation.

Both are natural, but theyโ€™re also self-centered.

By holding back, we deny the other person a chance to grow. We think we’re sparing them, but really, we’re protecting ourselves.

I used to do this all the time early in my career. I withheld feedback, afraid of being disliked, or gave it only to boost my teamโ€™s performance, which ultimately served my interests. Neither approach worked.

Hereโ€™s what Iโ€™ve learned: feedback, when done right, is an act of care.

Give it regularly. Make it constructiveโ€”something they can actually use to improve.

Consider both dimensions:

  1. Rational: Be specific. Give it promptly. Offer clear suggestions for improvement.
  2. Emotional: Come from a place of genuine care. Donโ€™t see the person as a problem to be fixed, but as someone worth investing in.

When feedback is both clear and compassionate, people will be more open to it.

Itโ€™s normal for it to feel awkward, especially when youโ€™re new to leadership.

But if youโ€™re not uncomfortable, youโ€™re not leading.

Try it out, and let me know how it goes.

Set Boundaries and Protect Your Energy

Do you feel like you need to be available at all hours to lead effectively?

Many emerging leaders believe this, but itโ€™s a misconception.

Always being โ€œonโ€ drains your energy, leaving you with little capacity for the strategic thinking needed to truly lead.

Effective leaders understand the importance of setting boundaries. Itโ€™s not about always being present; itโ€™s about being present at the right moments.

Your energy and focus are your greatest assetsโ€”donโ€™t waste them on every minor distraction.

And always having the answer ready creates dependencies, lowers your teamโ€™s sense of ownership and problem-solving skills.

Step back.

Focus on the bigger picture.

Thatโ€™s how you lead with impact.

Dealing With Difficult Colleagues

Some colleagues challenge our patience.

They might be self-centered, poor listeners, unreliable, or drenched in negativity.

Youโ€™ve tried to sidestep them. But then came the promotion to manager.

Now you have to face them head-on.

Motivating them feels like dragging an anchor through the mud.

And when they donโ€™t change, their behavior begins to cast shadows over your teamโ€™s morale and results.

<<๐—–๐˜‚๐—ฟ๐—ถ๐—ผ๐˜€๐—ถ๐˜๐˜† ๐—ฎ๐—ป๐—ฑ ๐—–๐—ผ๐—บ๐—ฝ๐—ฎ๐˜€๐˜€๐—ถ๐—ผ๐—ป ๐—ฒ๐—ป๐˜๐—ฒ๐—ฟ ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ ๐˜€๐˜๐—ฎ๐—ด๐—ฒ>>

What if their difficult behavior is not a wall, but a riddle to be solved?

What if their egocentrism and unreliability are scars from years of disappointment?

What if their negativity is a cry of deep concern for the team or companyโ€™s direction?

Framing them as merely difficult hardens your heart and colours every interaction.

It becomes you versus them. Trust evaporates, resistance rises.

You end up trying to prove them wrong, hoping theyโ€™ll change.

But that battle is always lost.

This doesnโ€™t mean tolerating bad behavior. Negativity is contagious and can spread like an oil spill.

As a leader, boundaries are essential. But before setting them, use Curiosity and Compassion.

Listen with genuine curiosity, without judgment. Take their concerns serious, and if they are valid, address them. Communicate on what youโ€™ve done.

If what they want is not something you can do, explain why, clearly and calmly.

No one wants to be forced to change.

Everyone wants to be heard and understood.

Honesty, Curiosity and Self-Reflection

This might be controversial, but hereโ€™s something we need to talk about…

Social media is flooded with leadership quotes. We like them, we share them, and we think, “Gosh, when will my manager finally get this?” ๐Ÿ™„

But how often do we take a hard look at our own leadership?

Hereโ€™s the irony โ€“ most managers are on LinkedIn daily, yet many teams are still struggling.

Itโ€™s easy to scroll through content and believe the advice is for others. But true leadership starts with self-examination.

Are we actively seeking out feedback, especially when itโ€™s tough to hear? Do we confront our own shortcomings?

Next time you come across a leadership quote, challenge yourself: Am I living up to this standard with my team?

If yes – how can you actually verify if this is true?

Keep the Dunning-Kruger effect in mind โ€“ people who objectively score among the bottom 0-25% on a particular skill rate themselves in the 50-75% bracket.

Unconscious incompetence is quite common.

โ— If you believe youโ€™re doing great, but your team is consistently difficult or disengaged, it might be a sign to reevaluate your approach.

Hereโ€™s the truth โ€“ the leaders who practice honest self-reflection grow the fastest. They get promoted faster, score better on performance reviews, and lead happier teams.

Letโ€™s not just scroll through inspirational quotes. Letโ€™s live them.

Imagine the impact you could have by truly applying these principles.

Reflect deeply, lead with authenticity, and watch your team โ€“ and yourself โ€“ flourish. ๐Ÿ’ช

Difficult Conversations – Transforming Stress Into Connection

You’re about to walk into a performance review with a team member, knowing you have to deliver some tough feedback.

Your chest tightens, your breath becomes shallow, and your mind races with worst-case scenarios.

Sound familiar?

This kind of physical reaction is a natural response to stress, but it can also be a sign of a deeper issue: closing your heart to protect yourself.

We’ve all been hurt or disappointed in life, which may cause our hearts to close. When we close our hearts, we not only shut out pain but also joy, love, and connection.

This automatic defense mechanism, designed to protect us from physical threats, often leaves us feeling isolated and disconnected at work.

Living with an open heart, no matter what life throws at us, is challenging but highly rewarding. I know it sounds like a motivational poster, but letโ€™s get practical.

Consider those moments right before difficult conversations or when receiving unexpected critical feedback.

The instinct to protect yourself causes physical constriction, especially around your chest.

You tense up, your breath becomes shallow, and your mind starts to close off, too.

Your mind and body are interconnected: the more you tense up, the more your mind focuses on perceived threats, the less connection you feel to others, the more your chest feels constricted.

Try this: each time you feel your chest tighten, consciously relax it.

Notice how often this happens throughout your day.

Slow your breathing and relax your entire body. This helps you stay calm and keeps your mind open.

When you’re open, you can connect more deeply with others. People will notice your openness and respond in kind, creating a ripple effect.

Take a deep breath, relax your chest, and embrace the day with an open heart. The rewards are immense.

The more you open up, the more the world opens up to you.

โค๏ธ