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Other People’s Opinion of You… Theirs or Yours?

You know that team member that thinks you lack the experience?

Or the colleague that thinks your meeting contributions don’t add value?

It stings, doesn’t it?

Now, consider this..

Deep down, there’s a good chance you believe these things about yourself              .

We often project our own hidden insecurities onto others.
We assume they see the worst in us because we do.
And when someone’s behavior even faintly matches our fear, it feels like confirmation.

For example:
Imagine someone who secretly believes they’re unworthy of love.
They might think others dislike them, avoid them, or find them boring.
To compensate, they become people pleasers—saying yes to everything, constantly seeking approval.

And when someone cancels plans or rejects their offer to help?
It cuts deep.
Not because of the action itself, but because it echoes that hidden belief:
I’m not worthy.

Now, think about this:
If someone insulted your blue hair but you didn’t have blue hair, you couldn’t care less.
It wouldn’t resonate.
But when a comment mirrors your own fears? It hurts.

So, how can we break this cycle?

The next time you think, “They must believe this about me,” pause.
Ask yourself: Could this be something I believe about myself?

Instead of being upset with them, turn inward.

Reflect:

  • Do I truly believe this about myself?
  • Can I be absolutely sure it’s true?
  • If not -is this belief helping me?

If it isn’t, start building a new belief—one rooted in kindness and compassion towards yourself.

This shift won’t happen overnight.
But with patience, you can rewrite the narrative.

And the world will start reflecting the version of you that you choose to believe in.

❤️

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