What if your manager or client gives you more work than you can handle?

What do you do when your manager or client asks you to take on more workโ€”when your schedule is already packed?

Most of us have two typical responses:

Say ๐˜†๐—ฒ๐˜€, and brace yourself for even more ๐˜ด๐˜ต๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ๐˜ด๐˜ด.
Say ๐—ป๐—ผ, and worry about coming across as ๐˜ถ๐˜ฏ๐˜ฉ๐˜ฆ๐˜ญ๐˜ฑ๐˜ง๐˜ถ๐˜ญ.

But thereโ€™s a better wayโ€”a skill borrowed from improv that can change everything.

Imagine this: Youโ€™re in a meeting, and your manager suddenly asks you to โ€œtake chargeโ€ of an urgent project. Your calendar is already full, but saying no feels risky.

Or picture this: A client asks for extra work, and the deadline is tight. Saying yes means youโ€™ll struggle to keep up with everything else, yet saying no might feel like letting them down.

This is where โ€œ๐—ฌ๐—ฒ๐˜€, ๐—ฎ๐—ป๐—ฑโ€ฆโ€ comes in.

The phrase โ€œYes, andโ€ฆโ€ comes from improv theater. Instead of rejecting an idea, performers use it to build on each otherโ€™s thoughts, creating a sense of flow.

In a work setting, it works much the same way. Hereโ€™s how it sounds in practice:

โ€œ๐˜ ๐˜ฆ๐˜ด, ๐˜โ€™๐˜ฅ ๐˜ฃ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ฉ๐˜ข๐˜ฑ๐˜ฑ๐˜บ ๐˜ต๐˜ฐ ๐˜ด๐˜ถ๐˜ฑ๐˜ฑ๐˜ฐ๐˜ณ๐˜ต ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ช๐˜ด, ๐˜ข๐˜ฏ๐˜ฅ ๐˜โ€™๐˜ฅ ๐˜ฏ๐˜ฆ๐˜ฆ๐˜ฅ ๐˜บ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ๐˜ณ ๐˜จ๐˜ถ๐˜ช๐˜ฅ๐˜ข๐˜ฏ๐˜ค๐˜ฆ ๐˜ฐ๐˜ฏ ๐˜ธ๐˜ฉ๐˜ช๐˜ค๐˜ฉ ๐˜ค๐˜ถ๐˜ณ๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ๐˜ฏ๐˜ต ๐˜ฑ๐˜ณ๐˜ช๐˜ฐ๐˜ณ๐˜ช๐˜ต๐˜ช๐˜ฆ๐˜ด ๐˜ต๐˜ฐ ๐˜ข๐˜ฅ๐˜ซ๐˜ถ๐˜ด๐˜ต ๐˜ต๐˜ฐ ๐˜ฎ๐˜ข๐˜ฌ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ช๐˜ต ๐˜ธ๐˜ฐ๐˜ณ๐˜ฌ.โ€

With โ€œ๐—ฌ๐—ฒ๐˜€, ๐—ฎ๐—ป๐—ฑโ€ฆโ€, you keep your response open and positive while setting clear boundaries. It helps you stay engaged without overcommitting.

The magic of โ€œYes, andโ€ฆโ€ is that it also:

โ€ข Shows youโ€™re willing to collaborate
โ€ข Acknowledges that your time and energy are limited
โ€ข Puts the choice back in their hands, giving them a sense of control

Next time someone asks you to do more than you can handle, try these two simple words.

Let me know how it goes ๐Ÿ™‚

What you resist, persists.

This is one of the most valuable lessons I’ve learned in my life.

For years, when feelings of anger, sadness, and fear came up, I tried to push them away, hoping they’d vanish. I’d look for distractions. Instead, they lingered on, sometimes for decades.

What actually works, is very counter-intuitive: embrace those emotions.

Feel them fully. Observe the physical expressions of the emotion in your body. Pay attention to the tightness in your chest, the constriction in your throat, the sting in your heart, the knot in your belly. Donโ€™t try to change them. Just feel them, or better: welcome them.

๐—ช๐—ต๐˜† ๐—ฑ๐—ผ๐—ฒ๐˜€ ๐˜๐—ต๐—ถ๐˜€ ๐˜„๐—ผ๐—ฟ๐—ธ?

Emotions are signals from our subconscious. Once we truly feel them, theyโ€™ve served their purpose and can disappear. But resisting them activates different areas of our brain (our fight-flight-freeze system), keeping those emotions alive and kicking.

Embracing them doesnโ€™t make deeply ingrained emotions disappear overnight, but itโ€™s an essential part of letting them go.

It’s exactly the opposite of what 95% of us are doing, but itโ€™s incredibly freeing, and it works.

For instance, if you’re about to present something to a big group and feel a rush of anxiety, our usual thought is: “Ugh, I wish I didn’t feel so anxious!”.

Next time, try this: pause, focus on the physical sensations, and allow yourself to feel the anxiety without trying to push it away. “I feel nervous, my chest feels tight, and that’s okay.”

Notice the tightness in your chest or the butterflies in your stomach. By acknowledging and feeling these sensations, you can reduce their power over you.

Take a moment today. Sit with whatever emotion is present. Feel it without judgment or negativity.

It can be tricky at first, but it’s definitely worth it.

Have you ever tried this method? What did it do for you?

I’d love to hear.


โ— Note: this is notns a solution to complex emotional issues or traumas, nor is it a substitute for therapy, when needed.

How To Make Meditation And Mindfulness A Part Of Your Life To Reduce Anxiety And Increase Happiness

Whatโ€™s the connection between The Muppets and mindfulness? Stick with meโ€”this isn’t the setup for a joke.. (Could be a great one though.)

Remember Waldorf and Statler, the critics in the balcony? Theyโ€™re a metaphor for our own minds: often negative, judging ourselves and others.

Evolutionarily, that makes perfect sense. Your brain – basically a radar scanning for danger – evolved in dangerous times.

Tigers could jump out of every bush. ๐Ÿ…

In modern times this constant scanning causes anxiety and unhappiness.

๐—ง๐—ต๐—ฒ ๐—ป๐—ผ๐˜-๐˜€๐—ผ-๐—ด๐—ฟ๐—ฒ๐—ฎ๐˜ ๐—ป๐—ฒ๐˜„๐˜€?

You canโ€™t completely silence those inner critics.

Theyโ€™re hard-wired into your brain. (And small, short doses of self-criticism can be healthy.)

๐—ง๐—ต๐—ฒ ๐—ด๐—ฟ๐—ฒ๐—ฎ๐˜ ๐—ป๐—ฒ๐˜„๐˜€?

Meditation offers an escape.

It allows you to step out of the balcony and watch those grumpy guys go on and on from a distance.

Realizing you donโ€™t have to listen to or reply to everything they say is such a relief. Most of it isn’t true anyway.

Two years ago I started a daily meditation practice. It gave me more peace of mind, positivity and focus. It reduced many of my worries.

Curious about meditation, and unsure where to begin? Try this:

โ–ธ Set an alarm or โณfor 5/10 mins.
โ–ธ Sit comfortably, eyes closed.
โ–ธ Focus on your breath.
โ–ธ Thoughts will interruptโ€” you canโ€™t stop them. Imagine Waldorf and Statler doing their usual thing.
โ–ธ Label these thoughts as thoughts, without engaging with them. Like watching clouds drift by.
โ–ธ Keep going back to your breath.

Thatโ€™s it.

Regular practice increases the amount of grey matter in your brain, increasing cognitive function. ๐Ÿง  (Or in less fancy terms: makes you smarter.)

It also boosts mood, focus and productivity and lowers stress and anxiety. It really works.

Does this mean thinking is bad? Absolutely not. But use it as a tool, when you need it.

Ready to stop being puppeteered by your thoughts? Give meditation a go. ๐Ÿ™๐Ÿป

Call 0800-MEDITATION for support. Or schedule a call with me.

Freeing Up More Time For The Things That Matter – Prioritizing Your Tasks

“Thereโ€™s never enough time in the day! What can I do about this?โ€ ๐Ÿ˜“ In our professional lives, urgent tasks and looming deadlines can leave us feeling stretched thin and stressed, draining our energy and creating anxiety.

This challenge echoes through the experiences of many professionals I’ve connected with recently. Especially in dynamic and high-pressure industries, the struggle to find time for what truly matters is real.

We prioritize the urgent over the important.

The price we pay? We neglect investing in ourselves. We constantly put out fires, and donโ€™t get to doing those things that prevent fires from breaking out or prepare us best for future opportunities.

โ–ถ Enter the Important vs Urgent (โ€˜Eisenhowerโ€™) matrix, a game-changer for those shifting from a reactive to a strategic approach.

Saying no to or delegating urgent but not important tasks might feel counterintuitive initially, but frees up precious time for activities that actually move the needle for you โ€“ whether itโ€™s learning about new technologies, staying up to date on case law, or following that leadership, mindfulness or communication training.

The template below can help you reprioritize your time and energy. โšก

And when you freed up that time, how can you be the most effective? Tip #1: Avoid distractions.

The constant need to respond immediately to messages and emails hijacks productivity and creates stress. Did you know it takes an average of 23 minutes to refocus after a distraction?

Scheduling uninterrupted time for your important work is a huge productivity booster. Here are 3 tips:

ยทย ย ย ย ย ย Try setting your OOO to โ€œFocussed work time โ€“ call for emergenciesโ€ for an hour daily, and turn off Teams. ๐Ÿคซ
ยทย ย ย ย ย ย Use the ‘Pomodoro technique’ (named after a pomodoro kitchen timer): 25 minutes of focused work, 5-minute break, repeat 3-4 times. ๐Ÿ…
ยทย ย ย ย ย ย Turn your phone’s messaging notifications off and put it out of sight. ๐Ÿ“ต

Freeing up this time can make a big impact over time: freeing up 2 hours for important work per week translates to around 100 hours per year.ย 

  • See ‘Free Downloads‘ for the Eisenhower Matrix PDF.

What Problems And Questions From My Team Should I Take On – And What Not?

Who else has felt the overwhelming urge to solve every problem that lands on their desk?

It’s a common trap for new managers, feeling like you need to be the hero.

Imagine walking around with a big backpack. ๐ŸŽ’

Every time your team comes to you with a problem, you have a choice โ€“ do you accept the problem and add it to your backpack, or not?

Put too much in your backpack, and you wonโ€™t be able to move anymore.

Great leadership isn’t about how many problems you can solve; it’s about how many problems you can teach your team to solve.

๐Ÿ“Œ Hereโ€™s a quick tip: Think of yourself as a guide rather than a fixer.

Next time a direct report comes to you with an issue, ask, “What part of this can you handle, and what do you need my help with? What solution have you considered?โ€.

This empowers them and helps you prioritize your own workload.

๐Ÿ‘‰ If you’re unsure whether to take on a problem, consider if it aligns with your key responsibilities. If it doesn’t, it’s likely not yours to solve.

Coaching your team to handle challenges not only lightens your load but also builds their confidence and skills.

This fosters a culture of problem-solving, innovation, and ownership.

Lastly, at a later moment, check-in and reflect with your team around problems you asked them to solve themselves, to build trust and enhance learning.

The Importance Of Taking Regular Breaks And Making Small Changes In Your Environment

Yesterday, something amazing happened in Amsterdam.

After months of cold and rain, suddenly the mercury hit 18 degrees โ€“ very rare for a day in March. ๐ŸŒž

This beautiful weather had a remarkable effect โ€“ it completely changed the city’s vibe. People were smiling more, looked happier, and seemed more energetic.

It reminded me of how much a change in environment can impact your mood.

I often see the same during coaching, where even moving to a new spot in the room can change your mood, perspective or feelings.

Let’s connect this to how many of our days look; spending hours behind screens.

Apparently, and I only stumbled upon this mind-blowing fact recently: Zoom didnโ€™t exist 20,000 years ago ( ๐Ÿ˜ฒ!!).

Our brains havenโ€™t yet evolved to deal with Zoom-a-thons.

What can you do?

Create several of these mini-spring moments throughout your day.

Every few hours, go for a short walk outside.

Or put on your favorite song and dance.

Or do some stretching.

Anything that gets your body moving.

These changes in the environment work like resets for your brain.

As the picture below shows: your brain needs to recharge – you can’t win all those Nobel prizes on an empty battery.

(The test person at the bottom, the one whose brain doesn’t look microwaved, took short breaks between calls.)