How to Climb the Corporate Ladder. Without Losing Your Soul.
This article is written by David Buirs, leadership coach and trainer in Amsterdam, for managers in the first zero to four years of their career. It examines how to climb the corporate ladder without compromising your integrity or relationships. The reader learns what two forms of ambition lead to, which small trade-offs erode character over time, and what behavior genuinely distinguishes effective leaders.
At some point in your career, you’ll meet someone who got far by making other people’s lives harder. The question worth asking is: how did they get there?
And more uncomfortably: could that happen to you?
I’ve seen a pattern over and over. Both in my leadership career and in my work as a leadership coach.
It doesn’t start with bad intentions. It usually starts with pressure. A tough quarter. A reorg. A colleague throwing their hat in the ring for the same promotion.
And then, slowly, something starts to change.
They cancel 1-on-1s with their team because there’s a presentation to polish for the executive meeting. Just this once. Then it happens again. They start answering people above them within minutes, and leaving the people below them waiting for days. They get short with colleagues who need something but can’t offer anything in return. They walk past the receptionist without a word, but light up the moment a senior leader walks in.
They start performing importance. In how they talk. In how available they are, and to whom.
I’ve seen manipulation. I’ve seen bullying. And what strikes me most, every time, is that the person doing it isn’t evil. They’re scared. Scared of losing power, reputation, money. The things they’ve come to value above everything else.
Nobody decides to become that person. It just starts to feel like survival.
Two Ways to Climb the Corporate Ladder
Most of us run on a kind of autopilot when it comes to ambition. The brain picks a goal, “make Senior X,” “get the promotion,” “hit the number,” and chases it. When you get there, there’s a brief rush. Then the feeling fades, and the mind finds the next target. And on it goes.
There are basically two ways to move up the ladder.
One is driven by fear and ego: protecting status, chasing titles, accumulating money as proof of worth. The other is less obvious, but much more valuable: building a great career while doing good things for the people around you. Growing. Learning. Leaving people better than you found them.
Both can get you far. But they lead to very different places.
It’s worth pausing to ask: why do I want that promotion? Not the obvious answer. The real one.
What People Regret at the End
Bronnie Ware spent years working in palliative care, sitting with people in the last weeks of their lives. She wrote down what they told her. The regrets that kept coming up.
Nobody said: “I wish I’d made it to VP.”
What they said was: “I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself.” “I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.” “I wish I’d let myself be happier.”
That last one stays with me. Let myself be happier. As if happiness was available all along, but something kept getting in the way.
In most cases, what got in the way was fear. Of not being enough. Of losing what they’d built. Of what people would think.
How You Lose Your Soul. One Small Trade-Off at a Time.
It doesn’t happen in one dramatic moment.
You stay quiet in a meeting when you witness unkind behavior and should have said something. You take the credit because the opportunity was there. You cancel the 1-on-1s to prepare a presentation that makes you look good upstairs. You ignore requests for help that have nothing in it for you. You tell yourself you’ll be different when you get to the next level.
And then you get there. And you’re not different. You’re just busier.
What Actually Works
A few things that consistently don’t work:
Taking credit for other people’s work. It can get you ahead short term. You’ll make enemies who have long memories.
Being warm to the people above you and cold to everyone else. People notice. They always notice.
Withholding information to protect your position. It might feel smart. It erodes trust in ways that are very hard to rebuild.
What does work:
Ask for feedback. Often. From different people. Research suggests around 95% of us believe we’re self-aware. The actual number is closer to 10 to 15%. Your blind spots are probably not a secret to the people around you.
Get specific with your manager about what success looks like in their eyes. A real conversation: what would make you say WOW at the end of this year?
Be proactive. Spot problems. Suggest solutions. Just be careful not to go around your manager to do it. As Robert Greene once wrote: never outshine the master.
The Trap of the First Few Years
Most managers I work with are newly promoted. Zero to four years in the role.
In that period, the temptation is strong to prove you deserve it. By working harder than everyone else. By knowing more. By being visible.
But the shift from expert to leader asks for something different. Doing less. Enabling more. Giving fewer answers. Asking better questions.
Those who learn that early grow faster than those who spend years trying to remain the best individual contributor. That’s exactly where good leadership training makes a difference. Not as a one-off event, but as a structured process that builds lasting behavioral change.
One Question Before You Go
Think of someone you genuinely admire. Someone who got really far. And who somehow stayed warm, stayed real. Someone you’d just call, simply: a good person.
You probably have someone in mind right now.
Ask yourself what it is about them that makes you think of them that way.
I’d be willing to bet it has nothing to do with their title.
This is one of the things I work on with managers in 1-on-1 leadership coaching. Not just how to perform better. But who you want to be while you’re doing it.
Curious whether this resonates with where you are right now? Let’s find out. Plan your free introduction here. Zero obligation.
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