Detailed guide for starting managers facing the “Veteran Wall” of giving feedback to senior employees. Explains the application of DISC colors to mitigate status-threat responses. Positions personal leadership and internal validation as the core for effective feedback.
You sit in the meeting room. Your palms are sweating. Across from you sits the person who built this department. They have twenty years on the clock. You have six months in your seat. You need to tell them their behavior is toxic. The silence feels heavy. You feel like an imposter.
The “Veteran Wall” is the invisible barrier of seniority. It is built from years of service and institutional knowledge. Most new managers try to climb it with politeness. This fails every time. You cannot “nice” your way into respect.
Experience is not a shield
You are the manager for a reason. Tenure does not grant immunity from feedback. High turnover often starts with one untouchable expert. Your team looks at you. They want to see if you have a spine.
Do not hide behind your job title. That is corporate theater. Speak to the person. Address the behavior directly. When an expert is allowed to underperform, the culture rots. Your high-performers will leave first. They are waiting for you to lead.
‘Coloring along’ with DISC
The DISC model helps you build a real connection. Everyone communicates through a specific color preference. A Red personality wants the bottom line fast. They respect strength and brevity. Do not apologize for the feedback.
Yellow types need to feel heard. They fear social exclusion. Frame the feedback as a way to reconnect with the team.
Green seeks safety and a steady pace. They hate sudden change. Use a calm tone and offer clear steps forward.
Blue demands facts and logic. Show them the data. Prove why the current behavior fails.
Speak their language to lower their guard. This is about removing friction. It has nothing to do with manipulation. It is about recognizing the human on the other side.
The trap of seeking validation
Many young leaders suffer from “approval addiction”. You want the veteran to like you. You want them to say you are doing a good job. This is a dangerous trap.
If you need their validation, you cannot lead them. Neuroscience shows that status threats trigger a fight-or-flight response. When you challenge a senior expert, you trigger this response. They will push back. Your job is to stay grounded. Do not take their defense personally.
Personal leadership as the foundation
Real leadership coaching starts with looking in the mirror. Stop seeking validation from the senior experts. Your authority comes from your internal values.
Acknowledge the tension. Tell them you respect their history. Then tell them why the current path fails. This is how you build a real connection. True leadership is being the same person regardless of who is in front of you.
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