Designing Your Future

What if you could design your future with the precision of an architect?

Not just think about it, but actually see it laid out in front of you, in full color, with images that inspire and motivate you every day.

That’s where a vision board comes in—a powerful tool that helps you map out your future, both personally and professionally.

Start simple. Use an app like OneNote or any image editor.

Now, think big.

What does your ideal life look like? Where do you see yourself living? What’s your dream job? How do you want to feel at work? What does your perfect workday involve?

Imagine a photo of a beautiful beach if you dream of more travel, or a portrait of someone who you admire. Maybe you’re striving for more balance, so you include a picture of a peaceful landscape. Or perhaps you’re focused on creativity and growth—find an image that sparks that energy.

Don’t forget to include the people who matter most to you. Add in personal goals, like a place you’ve always wanted to visit or a hobby you’ve been meaning to explore. Even symbols, like a lion for courage or a compass for direction, can serve as powerful reminders of the qualities you want to embody.

Bring all these elements together in one space, and keep it where you can see it every day.

As you continue to look at your vision board, it begins to work on your mind. You’ll find yourself more focused on what truly matters, more driven to turn these dreams into reality. It’s like giving your subconscious a roadmap to your future.

Start creating yours today and see where it leads.

If you could put one thing on your vision board right now, what would it be?

A Zen story With a Profound Lesson

Ever heard the Zen koan about the fish seller?

A koan is a short story to invoke insight.  I wasn’t sure to share it, as it’s quite abstract, but because I love it, I’m doing it anyway.

It goes like this:

“Banzan was walking through the market when he overheard a conversation between a fish seller and his customer.

The customer asked for the best piece of fish.

The seller replied, ‘All my pieces of fish are the best I have.’

Upon hearing this, Banzan was enlightened.”

Ok, that seller is either a genius, of desperately needs a marketing course. But what’s the point here actually?

It’s this: what if we saw every experience, every moment, as the best we have?

You might be thinking, “Yeah right, how is that aweful performance review the best moment I have?”

It’s not about the situation, it’s about how we 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘤𝘦𝘪𝘷𝘦 the situation.

When you approach a meeting thinking, “I hate this,” you’re already creating stress. For yourself.

You can’t control this initial spark of stress or negativity, that’s just your mind doing its thing.

But the moment you become aware of if, you have a choice to go along with that story, or not.

Usually, we go along with the mind’s story, and start having an internal conversation with ourselves about how this or that is terrible.

The result? It creates tension and drain your energy.

Instead, consider this approach:

✅ Before the meeting, take a moment to breathe and set an intention.
Think, “What can I gain from this meeting?”

✅ Realize: 𝗬𝗼𝘂’𝗿𝗲 𝗼𝗸𝗮𝘆. 𝗬𝗼𝘂’𝗿𝗲 𝗮𝗹𝗶𝘃𝗲.
✅ During the meeting, engage actively. Focus on understanding and connecting with the other, and contributing your best.
✅ After the meeting, find one positive takeaway, even if it’s small.

This shift in mindset doesn’t make the meeting (or situation) perfect, but it reduces the stress and helps you find value in the experience.

Even in our toughest moments, our bodies perform miracles. Billions of cells are working every second to keep us alive and functioning. This perspective can be incredibly empowering.

For managers, judging and resisting saps your energy.

Accepting each moment as it is can recharge your leadership and give you the clarity to inspire your team.

This doesn’t mean you can’t try to improve situations, or your life. To grow, learn. But when done from a state of accepting every moment as it is, without resistance, is so much more powerful.

So, what caused this major shift in Banzan after hearing that conversation?

He realized that his tendency to think “I don’t want this, I want that” was making him miserable.

And the lesson from the seller’s perspective: everything we do is the best in that moment. Big tasks or small, they all matter.

Try seeing each moment as perfect.

I know from experience: it’s not easy, but the better you get at this, the happier you’ll be.

<3

Dealing With Difficult Colleagues

Some colleagues challenge our patience.

They might be self-centered, poor listeners, unreliable, or drenched in negativity.

You’ve tried to sidestep them. But then came the promotion to manager.

Now you have to face them head-on.

Motivating them feels like dragging an anchor through the mud.

And when they don’t change, their behavior begins to cast shadows over your team’s morale and results.

<<𝗖𝘂𝗿𝗶𝗼𝘀𝗶𝘁𝘆 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗖𝗼𝗺𝗽𝗮𝘀𝘀𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗴𝗲>>

What if their difficult behavior is not a wall, but a riddle to be solved?

What if their egocentrism and unreliability are scars from years of disappointment?

What if their negativity is a cry of deep concern for the team or company’s direction?

Framing them as merely difficult hardens your heart and colours every interaction.

It becomes you versus them. Trust evaporates, resistance rises.

You end up trying to prove them wrong, hoping they’ll change.

But that battle is always lost.

This doesn’t mean tolerating bad behavior. Negativity is contagious and can spread like an oil spill.

As a leader, boundaries are essential. But before setting them, use Curiosity and Compassion.

Listen with genuine curiosity, without judgment. Take their concerns serious, and if they are valid, address them. Communicate on what you’ve done.

If what they want is not something you can do, explain why, clearly and calmly.

No one wants to be forced to change.

Everyone wants to be heard and understood.

Completing a 10-Day Vipassana Meditation Course – My Experiences and Insights

Last week, I completed a 10-day Vipassana meditation course. Many of you have asked about my experience, so I want to share it here, hoping it might offer some wisdom and inspiration for your own journey.

This is a longer post, but I hope it resonates with you.

The course was spartan. Every day began at 4 AM. We meditated for 10 hours a day, with three hours dedicated to sitting perfectly still. There was no speaking, no eye contact, and no physical touch. Our last meal was at 11 AM.

These strict conditions strip away distractions, forcing you to confront the raw workings of your mind.

The goal of Vipassana is simple: to see things as they really are. It teaches you to observe your sensations without reacting, cultivating a balanced mind.

The technique weakens the mind’s conditioning to chase after what we crave and flee from what we dislike. Instead, it allows you to respond with awareness rather than react instinctively.

𝗜𝗻𝘀𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝟭: 𝗘𝗺𝗯𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗦𝗶𝗹𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗦𝘁𝗶𝗹𝗹𝗻𝗲𝘀𝘀
During those 10 days, I experienced profound silence. In that silence, my mind became crystal clear. Memories I thought were lost came back. Without the constant influx of dopamine from my phone, email, and the news, I realized how much it clutters our brains.

𝘈𝘱𝘱𝘭𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯: In your work, carve out moments of silence and stillness. Disconnect from your devices. Use this time to think deeply, plan strategically, and reconnect with your inner self. It will enhance your clarity and decision-making.

𝗜𝗻𝘀𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝟮: 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗟𝗮𝘄 𝗼𝗳 𝗜𝗺𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗺𝗮𝗻𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲
One core lesson was the law of impermanence. Everything changes. Pain and pleasure, joy and sorrow—they all come and go. This understanding brings peace and balance.

𝘈𝘱𝘱𝘭𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯: In leadership, remember that challenges and successes are both temporary. This perspective helps you stay grounded during crises and humble during triumphs.

𝗜𝗻𝘀𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝟯: 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗠𝗮𝘀𝗸 𝗪𝗲 𝗪𝗲𝗮𝗿
We all create images of ourselves and spend tremendous energy protecting them. Vipassana strips away these masks, revealing our true selves.

𝘈𝘱𝘱𝘭𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯: As a leader, embrace authenticity. Encourage your team to be genuine. Authenticity fosters trust and deeper connections, which are the foundations of strong leadership.

𝗜𝗻𝘀𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝟰: 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗣𝗼𝘄𝗲𝗿 𝗼𝗳 𝗠𝗲𝘁𝘁𝗮
At the end of the course, we practiced Metta Bhavana, the meditation of loving-kindness. It’s a powerful exercise to cultivate compassion and love. Simply focus on sending well-wishes to yourself and others.

𝘈𝘱𝘱𝘭𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯: Start a Metta meditation practice. Increasing your empathy and compassion will help you become a better leader.

Vipassana was a challenging, yet profoundly rewarding experience. It taught me the value of silence, the nature of impermanence, the importance of authenticity, and the power of compassion.

These courses are run by volunteers and funded only by donations from former students. I am deeply grateful for their dedication and support.

One Year After Leaving My Corporate Career

This week marks exactly one year after my last working day of a decade-long career, leading teams.

And the beginning of a new adventure.

So much has happened since!

I completed my Co-Active coach training, started my own business, and found my ikigai in leadership development coaching.

(If your Japanese is a bit rusty – ikigai is about doing that which you love, are good at, and that the world needs.)

The most rewarding part of leadership development is that it works like an amplifier.

A leader’s growth naturally extends to their team. Their success and well-being inspire those around them, creating a ripple effect of positive change.

I feel more alive, fulfilled, and happy than ever.

The positive feedback and support from many of you has meant the world to me.

Special shoutout to Frederike Driesse and Jasper Brand at The Talent Institute in Amsterdam for their trust, as they were my first B2B client. The Talent Institute creates inspiring development programs for talents in design, innovation, and marketing. Worth checking out.

And as someone who’s slightly introverted, I’ve discovered a surprising love for networking and connecting with new people.

It’s not all roses and sunshine though. (What?! 😜)

Challenges like financial uncertainty, no-shows, and missing regular colleague interactions are real.

But for me, it’s definitely worth it.

A key goal the past half year was to post valuable content for you weekly.

I’m now heading off for a 10-day silent retreat, so next week will be my first break from posting.

I look forward to returning with fresh clarity and inspiration for the coming year.

And there’s a very exciting project on the horizon – more details soon.

Huge thanks to all of you for your continued support!

❤️🙏

Honesty, Curiosity and Self-Reflection

This might be controversial, but here’s something we need to talk about…

Social media is flooded with leadership quotes. We like them, we share them, and we think, “Gosh, when will my manager finally get this?” 🙄

But how often do we take a hard look at our own leadership?

Here’s the irony – most managers are on LinkedIn daily, yet many teams are still struggling.

It’s easy to scroll through content and believe the advice is for others. But true leadership starts with self-examination.

Are we actively seeking out feedback, especially when it’s tough to hear? Do we confront our own shortcomings?

Next time you come across a leadership quote, challenge yourself: Am I living up to this standard with my team?

If yes – how can you actually verify if this is true?

Keep the Dunning-Kruger effect in mind – people who objectively score among the bottom 0-25% on a particular skill rate themselves in the 50-75% bracket.

Unconscious incompetence is quite common.

❗ If you believe you’re doing great, but your team is consistently difficult or disengaged, it might be a sign to reevaluate your approach.

Here’s the truth – the leaders who practice honest self-reflection grow the fastest. They get promoted faster, score better on performance reviews, and lead happier teams.

Let’s not just scroll through inspirational quotes. Let’s live them.

Imagine the impact you could have by truly applying these principles.

Reflect deeply, lead with authenticity, and watch your team – and yourself – flourish. 💪

Difficult Conversations – Transforming Stress Into Connection

You’re about to walk into a performance review with a team member, knowing you have to deliver some tough feedback.

Your chest tightens, your breath becomes shallow, and your mind races with worst-case scenarios.

Sound familiar?

This kind of physical reaction is a natural response to stress, but it can also be a sign of a deeper issue: closing your heart to protect yourself.

We’ve all been hurt or disappointed in life, which may cause our hearts to close. When we close our hearts, we not only shut out pain but also joy, love, and connection.

This automatic defense mechanism, designed to protect us from physical threats, often leaves us feeling isolated and disconnected at work.

Living with an open heart, no matter what life throws at us, is challenging but highly rewarding. I know it sounds like a motivational poster, but let’s get practical.

Consider those moments right before difficult conversations or when receiving unexpected critical feedback.

The instinct to protect yourself causes physical constriction, especially around your chest.

You tense up, your breath becomes shallow, and your mind starts to close off, too.

Your mind and body are interconnected: the more you tense up, the more your mind focuses on perceived threats, the less connection you feel to others, the more your chest feels constricted.

Try this: each time you feel your chest tighten, consciously relax it.

Notice how often this happens throughout your day.

Slow your breathing and relax your entire body. This helps you stay calm and keeps your mind open.

When you’re open, you can connect more deeply with others. People will notice your openness and respond in kind, creating a ripple effect.

Take a deep breath, relax your chest, and embrace the day with an open heart. The rewards are immense.

The more you open up, the more the world opens up to you.

❤️

Admitting We Don’t Have All The Answers – Increasing Vulnerability In The Workplace

“I don’t know.”

“I really don’t know.”

How refreshing to admit this!

It’s something I wish I’d said more often in my career.

Do we need to be able to answer every question? Must we have an opinion on everything? Not necessarily.

Especially in leadership, there’s an expectation to respond to every query and attend every meeting.

Sometimes it’s because we feel responsible; other times, it’s because we fear appearing incapable.

But it’s okay not to know everything.

Acknowledging this doesn’t diminish your value.

If the question is important, you can admit you don’t have the answer yet, but you’ll try to find out.

Or, recognize that you might have other priorities demanding your energy.

Perhaps, the person asking could even discover the answer themselves.

Let’s show up with more vulnerability at work, and less need for perfection.

By doing so, we can redirect our time and energy towards what truly matters.

Great Leaders Are Great Communicators

Think of someone you know that communicates really well.

And someone that doesn’t.

What makes the difference?

Communication in leadership is like fine-tuning a musical instrument—it makes every performance better.

Especially for starting managers, getting this right from the beginning gives you a head start.

Here’s a challenge for you: 𝗰𝗵𝗼𝗼𝘀𝗲 𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝗮𝘀𝗽𝗲𝗰𝘁 𝗼𝗳 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗺𝘂𝗻𝗶𝗰𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝘁𝗼 𝗶𝗺𝗽𝗿𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗺𝗼𝗻𝘁𝗵.

Need inspiration? Below you’ll find some ideas:

𝗔𝗰𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝗟𝗶𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴
📌 Tip: Use reflective listening techniques, such as paraphrasing what the speaker has said to confirm understanding.

𝗖𝗹𝗲𝗮𝗿 𝗔𝗿𝘁𝗶𝗰𝘂𝗹𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻
📌 Tip: Before communicating, take a moment to organize your thoughts to ensure clarity and precision in your message.

𝗣𝗲𝗿𝘀𝘂𝗮𝘀𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝗖𝗼𝗺𝗺𝘂𝗻𝗶𝗰𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻
📌 Tip: Remember WIIFM – “What’s In It For Me”? – A thought that’s often on our minds (we are human, after all). If you can pro-actively address this in your communication, you’re more convincing.

𝗔𝗱𝗮𝗽𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗶𝗹𝗶𝘁𝘆 𝗶𝗻 𝗖𝗼𝗺𝗺𝘂𝗻𝗶𝗰𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻
📌 Tip: Adjust your communication style to match the preferences of your audience—some may prefer directness, while others may need more context.

𝗔𝗰𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝗔𝘀𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗙𝗲𝗲𝗱𝗯𝗮𝗰𝗸
📌 Tip: Regularly ask for feedback on your communication style and effectiveness, showing you value continuous improvement.

𝗖𝗼𝗻𝘁𝗲𝘅𝘁 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗪𝗵𝘆
📌 Tip: When giving instructions, starting meetings or sharing updates, always explain the context. You might see the bigger picture, but your audience might not.

𝗔𝘀𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀
📌 Tip: Ask open-ended questions that start with “what” or “how” to encourage detailed responses and deeper discussions.

Improving how you communicate can dramatically enhance your interactions and the impact you can make.

The Most Important Realization In Your Life

Is there life before death?

Wow, easy there, buddy. What a morbid question!

For many of us in the West, contemplating death is taboo. We avoid it at all costs.

While in many philosophies and cultures, from the Stoics to current day Tibet, contemplating our mortality is seen as an essential part of life.

In the West, we often overvalue “time = money”, and believe we are here on Earth only to be productive.

We can get too focused on promotions, raises or material success, forgetting that those things in itself do not lead to happiness.

We act like we only live to work.

But is that true?

Let’s do a thought experiment..

What if you knew you only have 1 more month to live?

Would you then lay awake at night, thinking about what your manager said to you? Or about that presentation that didn’t go as planned?

Would you add that extra project to your already full schedule, or would you choose to spend more time with friends or family?

Would you spend your commute mindlessly scrolling the news, or would you enjoy the colours in the sky?

If you would do things differently after hearing that news – why not do it now?

Work is an essential part of our life. But it’s not the reason why we’re here.

Reflect on what it means to you to live a full and happy life.

You don’t even have to switch jobs, as there are many ways to make your current job more enjoyable and meaningful.

In the evening, spend five minutes reflecting on your day. Write about moments or people that made you feel alive, connected, or genuinely happy.

This helps in recognizing the value of your daily experiences beyond work achievements and material success.

Burning yourself out chasing after more senior titles or money will not get you what you hope for. It never does in the end.

Instead, work to make a positive impact – on your team, your company and for your clients.

Work to grow, learn, and have fun.

Work to connect with people.

Work to support your life outside of work.

You only have one life.

Make the most out of it.