Performance review tips for managers

David Buirs - Leadership Coach & Management Trainer

Performance review tips for managers: how to run a conversation that actually works

David Buirs is a leadership coach in the Amsterdam region. This article gives concrete performance review tips for managers. You will learn how to run a review without surprises, with a clear yardstick built on KPIs, OKRs, development goals and behavior, and how to fully understand decisions from your own manager before passing them on to your team.

You stare at the calendar. Next Friday, three o'clock. The conversation you'd rather push to next quarter. You know this team member isn't performing. And you also know you've let it slide for months.

Welcome to the performance review as most managers (new or experienced) run it. Once a year, badly prepared, no clear yardstick, with the quiet hope that it won't be too painful.

Why most performance reviews barely move the needle

Gallup studied how employees worldwide experience their performance reviews. The findings are sobering. Only 21% say their review motivates them to do better work. Only 2% of CHROs in the Fortune 500 believe their own performance management system is effective. And about a third of all reviews actually make performance worse, not better. You can read the Gallup research here.

These numbers point to a system that keeps falling into the same trap.

The cause is almost always identical. The review comes too late, is too vague, and feels to the employee like an opinion rather than an account of facts. The manager has said little throughout the year. At year-end, twenty minutes have to cover what should have been discussed months earlier.

For you as a manager, this is good news. If you do it differently, you stand out. Your people benefit. And your own manager notices.

No surprises. Not a single one.

The most important rule: a good performance review contains no new information.

If your team member hears for the first time that they are falling short on something they had no idea about, you have failed. Because you saved something for November that should have been raised in March. That isn't fair. And it doesn't work.

The review is a summary of a year. What you discuss should already be familiar from at least four or five 1:1 conversations earlier. The official meeting puts it in writing. Nothing more.

This requires regular check-ins from you, short notes throughout the year, and the courage to address small things in the moment. Not waiting until they grow into something big.

Know exactly what you're evaluating on

This is where many managers get stuck. They evaluate on gut feel. No clear yardstick. Which makes every conversation feel arbitrary.

My advice: build your evaluation framework on at least four components.

KPIs. KPI stands for Key Performance Indicator. A measurable number that shows whether a goal is being met. Think revenue, conversion, delivery time, customer satisfaction. Non-negotiable. Known at the start of the year, visible all year long.

OKRs. OKR stands for Objectives and Key Results. An ambitious objective tied to two to four measurable key results that show whether you have achieved it. OKRs go beyond business as usual. They define where the team is trying to grow.

Self-defined development goals. Let your team member formulate one challenging development goal themselves. Something personal. Improving a difficult conversation skill, building a new area of expertise, daring to present to senior leadership. The condition: it has to be genuinely challenging. Otherwise people write down something they would have done anyway. And then your job doesn't stop there. Coach them throughout the year to actually reach that goal. Bring it back into your 1:1s. Ask how it's going. Make space for them to practice and reflect.

How someone behaves. How they collaborate. Whether they show up in line with company values. Someone who delivers 100% of her results but consistently belittles colleagues should not get a strong review. Results without behavior is half a review.

With these four corners in place, your team member knows exactly what you're looking at. And what they can influence themselves.

Talk to HR before the year starts

An important nuance: in most companies, you can't fully define these criteria yourself. Especially around company values, behavioral criteria, and formal rating scales, much is set centrally. That's HR's territory.

So talk to HR before the year begins. Which criteria are fixed by the organization? What freedom do you have to set your own emphasis, for example on KPIs or development goals for your team? How do company values weigh into the final review?

If HR is leaving this loose or vague, don't wait. Take the initiative. Suggest a conversation. Ask where the clarity can be sharpened. That's the kind of preparation a leader who takes their team seriously brings to the table.

For senior leaders this matters double. As an executive, you partly shape how well manager reviews work across the entire organization. Your voice belongs in that conversation. Coaching for senior leaders helps to run these conversations sharply at the leadership level.

Be honest about what good work means

Here it gets uncomfortable. Because managers often don't dare to say this out loud.

Hard work is an investment. And investments don't always pay off.

If someone has worked themselves to the bone all year and the results aren't there, you can express appreciation for the effort. But the review itself shouldn't be skewed by it. Results count. Otherwise you simultaneously devalue the contribution of someone who did deliver.

This is hard because empathy tells us that effort deserves recognition. That's true. But effort and result are two separate variables. You can tell someone they worked hard and that the outcome wasn't enough. That's clarity. Empathy and clarity don't cancel each other out.

Ditch the feedback sandwich

The classic feedback sandwich works like this: say something nice, wrap criticism in the middle, end with something nice. The idea is to soften the pill. In practice, it gets two things wrong at once.

People who overestimate themselves only hear the positive. The criticism slides right past them. People who are insecure only register the negative. The appreciation, they don't believe.

So you end up with two kinds of employees who do nothing with your conversation.

A better approach: separate your messages. Give explicit, standalone praise for what's going well. Give explicit, standalone feedback on what needs to improve. Treat them as two separate conversations within one session. No wrapping. No transition phrases to soften the message.

People feel taken more seriously by clarity than by tidiness.

Understand what you're passing on

This may be the least mentioned, but most important point for you as a manager.

Jocko Willink, former Navy SEAL and author of Extreme Ownership, writes about a principle he calls Leading Up the Chain of Command. The idea: before you pass a decision from above to your team, it's your job to fully understand that decision yourself.

Translate that to performance reviews. Your manager hands you guidelines for the review cycle. Or a salary increase budget that's tight. Or a new set of criteria. Many managers take it and pass it on. With a shrug when their team member asks why.

That's a failure of leadership.

Before you pass anything along, ask your own manager questions. Understand the reasoning. Ask critical questions from a place of curiosity. Make sure you can defend the decision as if it were your own. Because the moment you pass it on, it is yours.

This does two things. Your people get a real explanation, not a bureaucratic one. And you grow as a leader. You learn to lead up to your manager, not only down to your team.

Prepare like it matters

Preparation for a performance review doesn't start the week before. It starts eleven months earlier.

Keep a simple log per team member. Nothing elaborate. Short notes. A strong performance here, a missed deadline there, a great moment in a meeting, a conversation that didn't quite land.

By year-end you'll have dozens of concrete points. That's what gives a review substance. No vague impressions. No recency bias. No gut.

For the conversation itself: write down your three main messages. What does your team member need to know when they walk out of the room? Start there. End there. Everything in between is filling.

For organizations that want their entire management team to get structurally better at this, a leadership development program offers the structure that fits.


A final thought

A performance review is, at its core, a form of care. You're telling someone where they stand. What's going well. What needs to improve. How they can grow.

Avoiding the discomfort feels kind. In practice you leave someone with more uncertainty than they had before the conversation. Real care is clarity.

Want to get structurally better at this as a leader? Leadership coaching helps you not only survive these conversations but use them as moments of growth. Plan a free introduction via contact. No sales. Just a good conversation.

How To Feel More Empathy at Work

David Buirs Leadership Coach

The first thing I do in the morning?
Wish total strangers a happy life.

The challenge? Doing it before coffee. ☕😊

This is part of a Loving Kindness meditation (also called Metta). And it has some incredible benefits:
✔ Increases empathy & emotional intelligence
✔ Boosts happiness & reduces stress
✔ Strengthens your ability to deal with difficult people

It’s simple. Here’s how:
1️⃣ Close your eyes. Picture someone you love. Wish them happiness & health. (2 min)
2️⃣ Do the same for someone you like.
3️⃣ Now, visualize someone neutral—like a cashier who helped you.
4️⃣ Picture yourself. Yes, you deserve kindness too.
5️⃣ Think of someone you find difficult. Wish them well.
6️⃣ Finally, choose someone you really dislike. Wish them happiness, too.

Wait—why would you do that?
Not because you condone bad behavior, but because it rewires your brain for more emotional balance.

It might feel weird at first. But over time, it softens frustration and strengthens your ability to lead with compassion.

Would you ever try this? Or does it sound too out there for you? 👀

Reduce Time Spent On Your Phone And Reclaim Your Focus And Productivity

Our greatest fear? Not nuclear apocalypse or robot overlords, but something 𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘭𝘺 horrifying: surviving two hours phone-free.

So, challenge accepted – last Sunday I ventured into the unknown at a Digital Detox event organized by The Offline Club in Amsterdam – kudos to Ilya Kneppelhout for hosting it.

The rules were simple: surrender your phone at the door and engage in some old school, wholesome activities like reading, face-to-face conversations, board games or even (😱) writing.

No scrolling, no notifications, and no social media. The effects? I came out feeling recharged and connected.

The truth is, we’re all phone addicts. Look around any bus or train—every face is lit up by the glow of a screen, lost in a digital world, starving for genuine connection but endlessly scrolling social media.

We need our phones and it’s hard to live without social media – I’m writing this on a social platform – but most of us feel we’ve become 𝘵𝘰𝘰 dependent on them.

It’s a tough battle: apps are designed to be addictive, success being measured in time spent on the app. A 2023 University of Michigan study even shows teens get an average 240 (!) phone notifications every day.

The impact on your brain? Increased stress, anxiety, and less ability to focus – both at work and in our private lives.

What can you do?
– Turn off notifications
– Set time-limits on apps
– When in conversation, keep phones from the table
– Create phone-free rooms (bedroom) or moments (lunch, dinner)
– Use the grayscale mode on your phone (for iPhone – Settings – Accessibility – Display Text & Size – Color Filters)

After I came home I discovered I forgot something: my phone, which was still in the box. To me, that’s a successful event. 😀

This week, I’m committing to one hour daily of digital silence. 📵

Which brave souls are joining me? 💪

Make Your Meetings Great – And Save Time And Energy

Ever wondered why your meetings rarely end before their scheduled end time?

*𝗦𝘂𝘀𝗽𝗲𝗻𝘀𝗲*

*𝗗𝗿𝘂𝗺-𝗿𝗼𝗹𝗹*

Most of us love to talk!

Ok, that probably didn’t come as a surprise.

While talking builds connection, having days full of long calls depletes our energy.

And we’re all busy, sometimes overworked.

We spend so much time in calls,
calls that don’t end when they served their purpose.

They end when the time is up. Or after.

Then we rush to the next one, skipping lunch, feeling stressed.

How can we do this better?

As a team, take ownership of your time and productivity, together.

I created a team agreement for you that can help you.

Give it a try. Let me know how many free hours you gained this month!

See -Free Downloads – for the document.