Struggling with tough conversations as a new manager? You’re not aloneโover 90% of your peers feel the same.
I’ve certainly been there. Feeling anxious before feedback sessions or dreading delivering bad news.
So what turns your regular chat into a difficult conversation?
1) ๐ข๐ฝ๐ฝ๐ผ๐๐ถ๐ป๐ด ๐๐ถ๐ฒ๐๐ย โก โฌ 2) The ๐ผ๐๐๐ฐ๐ผ๐บ๐ฒ ๐บ๐ฎ๐๐๐ฒ๐ฟ๐ โ 3) ๐๐บ๐ผ๐๐ถ๐ผ๐ป๐ run high ๐จ
Ironically, the more important the conversation, the harder it is to handle it well.
To guide you, Iโve created these slides for you. The information comes from a book I love: ๐๐ณ๐ถ๐ค๐ช๐ข๐ญ ๐๐ฐ๐ฏ๐ท๐ฆ๐ณ๐ด๐ข๐ต๐ช๐ฐ๐ฏ๐ด.
With over 4 million copies sold, itโs a game-changer for leaders.
It helped me tremendously in my career. I hope it can help you too.
If you want to discuss specific situations that you find challenging, do reach out, I’d love to help.
With AI increasingly handling technical tasks, the spotlight is on human skills โ those essential, automation-resistant qualities that enrich our work interactions.
Think empathy, compassion, intuition, and leadership; they’re not just nice to have, they’re crucial for your career success.
Recent insights from 650 L&D and HR leaders confirm this trend, placing human skills on the second highest priority on the L&D agenda, just after business skills. As AI transforms technical work, the human touch grows in importance.
Particularly for leaders, strong human skills are becoming indispensable. (โ๐๐ฐ๐ง๐ต ๐ด๐ฌ๐ช๐ญ๐ญ๐ดโ? – 2023 called, they want you back).
Case in point: “Manager effectiveness”, which is includes human skills like leadership and adaptability, is now the #1 concern for HR leaders worldwide (๐ด๐ฐ๐ถ๐ณ๐ค๐ฆ: ๐๐ฐ๐ถ๐ณ๐ด๐ฆ๐ณ๐ข ๐๐ฐ๐ฃ ๐๐ฌ๐ช๐ญ๐ญ๐ด ๐๐ฆ๐ฑ๐ฐ๐ณ๐ต 2024). This indicates a growing emphasis on these competencies in modern management.
If you’re ready to develop these skills but unsure where to start, consider Active Listening, a foundational element of true connection and communication.
Transitioning from listening to analyze to listening to understand was a personal gamechanger for me. ๐ก
This key skill strongly supports workplace communication and relationships. There are plenty of resources, including many free YouTube videos, to help you get started.
Enhancing these human skills in 2024 and beyond will not only keep us relevant, but also amplify our impact in an AI-driven professional world.
At the beginning of this new year, take a moment to consider: which human skill do you want to strengthen in 2024? Your choice could significantly shape your professional path.
Having explored the value of showing appreciation in our professional lives, I’m curious to hear about your experiences. Did it bring a new energy to your work interactions?
Today Iโd love to share some insights with you around how gratitude can benefit you in your personal life.
Feeling grateful has been scientifically proven to trigger positive changes in your brain. It boosts the production of serotonin and dopamine โ the neurotransmitters responsible for feelings of happiness and well-being.
At the same time, it lowers cortisol levels, effectively reducing stress.
An easy way to embed gratitude in your life, is to start a gratitude journal. Each day, take a moment to write down three things you’re grateful for. These could be simple joys, friends or loved ones, or the beauty in everyday moments.
Or, integrate gratitude into a daily ritual, like sipping your morning coffee, to reflect on who or what brings positivity into your life.
Personally, I try to include the often-overlooked miracles in my gratitude practice. Our ability to see the sunrise, hear music, or simply the fact of being alive today are extraordinary gifts. Recognizing these aspects can bring a deeper sense of appreciation and joy to your life.
I encourage you to try a two-minute daily practice for the next two weeks, and to avoid negative thoughts or words during those 2 minutes. Research shows this leads to the biggest results. Observe how this small commitment can lead to a noticeable shift in your stress levels and overall happiness.
It’s not just skills or hard workโit’s the climate of trust they operate in, where making mistakes is not a fireable offense but a growth opportunity.
Yesterday, I had the pleasure of attending an eye-opening workshop by Gabriele Galassi, organized by the inspiring the D2 collective.
The topic: psychological safety at work.
A standout insight?
Googleโs research shows that top teams succeed not because they are smarter, but because there is more psychological safety.
Safer to speak up, challenge norms, make mistakes, report errors and give each other tough feedback.
A few more learnings from yesterday I want to share with you:
๐ Having a great variation of nationalities on a team promotes psychological safety.
๐ Team cohesion is another strong predictor of performance. Teams where members are willing and able to establish strong relationships, to listen and feel empathy for each other and to give and take feedback, perform better than regular teams.
๐ In the workplace, we start overvaluing tasks over relationships. Starting the day with a relationship-building exercise over a task-oriented meeting, can have surprisingly beneficial results.
๐ A characteristic of high-performing teams is that members speak roughly in equal measure, keeping contributions short and sweet.
Improving psychological safety and team cohesion is one of the topics I work on with my ambitious leadership development clients.
Do you want to boost your teamโs performance too?
Too hard or too soft? It’s not a pillow questionโit’s about leadership style.
An effective leader knows how to combine assertiveness with empathy.
Assertiveness doesn’t mean being harsh; it’s about finding the right balance between passivity and aggression.
Empathy isn’t about just accepting everything – it’s about truly understanding and sharing someone else’s feelings.
A 2500-year-old practice I’ve grown to love for increasing empathy and compassion is ‘Metta’, or ‘loving-kindness’ meditation.
I was skeptical at first, but integrating it into my routine increased my empathy and changed how I connect with others.
How to practice ‘๐ ๐ฒ๐๐๐ฎ’?
๐๐ถ๐ป๐ฑ ๐ฎ ๐ค๐๐ถ๐ฒ๐ ๐ฆ๐ฝ๐ผ๐: Sit comfortably, close your eyes.
๐ฉ๐ถ๐๐๐ฎ๐น๐ถ๐๐ฒ ๐ฆ๐ผ๐บ๐ฒ๐ผ๐ป๐ฒ ๐ฌ๐ผ๐ ๐๐ฎ๐ฟ๐ฒ ๐๐ฏ๐ผ๐๐: Start by picturing your best friend. Wish them health, happiness, and well-being. Connect with these feelings.
๐๐ ๐ฝ๐ฎ๐ป๐ฑ ๐ฌ๐ผ๐๐ฟ ๐ฆ๐ฐ๐ผ๐ฝ๐ฒ: Gradually move to someone neutral, like a helpful store clerk, and then to someone you have difficulties with or don’t like.
๐ช๐ถ๐๐ต ๐ง๐ต๐ฒ๐บ ๐ช๐ฒ๐น๐น: Remember, this isnโt just for them; itโs for enhancing your own emotional powers.
By practicing these steps, you’re strengthening your empathy muscle by creating stronger neural pathways for compassion and empathy in your brain.
Interested in mastering both assertive and empathetic leadership?
Letโs chat about how these skills can transform your approach and help you lead more effectively.
โA study found a 15% (!) drop in the risk of dying over the next decade for people finding their purpose, regardless of age.โ
What?!
Raise your hand if you ever subtly rolled your eyes at the mentioning of “finding your purpose ๐ซ”? I get it โ it can sound like part of a motivational YouTube video.
If youโre like me, youโd rather trust data and research than grandiose terms. No crystal-balls magic, just empirically proven benefits. ๐ผ
Well, the research paints a compelling picture: knowing and living your life purpose isn’t just warm and fuzzy; it’s the secret sauce for success.
Here are some of the amazing benefits (sources provided below), accessible for everyone:
๐ช A long-term study found that making a significant step towards finding your purpose caused a 15% drop in the risk of dying over the next decade.
๐ More happiness, stronger relationships, better sleep, and mental health.
๐ฐ Having a sense of purpose predicts greater income and net worth.
๐ And it’s not just personal โ purpose is a key ingredient to exceptional leadership.
โฌ For companies, aligning individual and organizational purpose brings a ton of benefits, from a fourfold boost in engagement to a twofold increase in employee retention.
So many advantages, whatโs the catch? Do you need to save the whales to reap the benefits? Win a Nobel Prize? No, not at all.
(Donโt let me stop you though. ๐)
Also, it’s personal โ you donโt have to share it with anyone. ๐คซ
And here’s the kicker: purpose works regardless of your worldview, religion, or lack thereof. It’s about the impact you want to make – for yourself and others.
Who else has felt the overwhelming urge to solve every problem that lands on their desk?
It’s a common trap for new managers, feeling like you need to be the hero.
Imagine walking around with a big backpack. ๐
Every time your team comes to you with a problem, you have a choice โ do you accept the problem and add it to your backpack, or not?
Put too much in your backpack, and you wonโt be able to move anymore.
Great leadership isn’t about how many problems you can solve; it’s about how many problems you can teach your team to solve.
๐ Hereโs a quick tip: Think of yourself as a guide rather than a fixer.
Next time a direct report comes to you with an issue, ask, “What part of this can you handle, and what do you need my help with? What solution have you considered?โ.
This empowers them and helps you prioritize your own workload.
๐ If you’re unsure whether to take on a problem, consider if it aligns with your key responsibilities. If it doesn’t, it’s likely not yours to solve.
Coaching your team to handle challenges not only lightens your load but also builds their confidence and skills.
This fosters a culture of problem-solving, innovation, and ownership.
Lastly, at a later moment, check-in and reflect with your team around problems you asked them to solve themselves, to build trust and enhance learning.
Suited for mid-level to senior team members, mentoring offers guidance and wisdom from personal experience. Guide your team members on their professional journey. Longer term.
Ideal for more senior team members, coaching is an equal partnership that promotes self-discovery and maximizes their potential. No advice or instructions are given.
Through questions, help your coachee discover what they want, and how theyโll get there. Only effective if coachee is motivated to be coached.
โ ๐๐ช๐ฑ: a good coach is a good listener โ practice active listening and ask open-ended questions.
Every team member, regardless of their role or seniority, might find value in training, mentoring, or coaching, tailored to their unique needs at different times.
Which of the three did you benefit the most from in your career?
